Restlessness

Yesterday was a quiet but nice day. It has been incredibly hot this week, more like mid summer than spring and I really am not a fan of the sun. But with my blood results showing how seriously low my vitamin D levels are I have been sitting on the balcony twice a day for 20 minutes or so to try and get some natural vitamin D into me. Not literally sitting on the balcony of course, sitting on a chair to be precise.. I had a silly image of myself on my balcony 6 floors up legs a swinging, which is dangerous so don’t try that at home kids! 😉

I am still really hopeful about my OT visit, but now I am also now looking around my bedroom thinking it needs a serious sort out before she visits. It’s been topsy turvey for awhile and it’s really starting to bug me. I like things tidy, not OCD tidy but not so messy that have no order whatsoever. Everything takes so long to do though as I get so tired and painful after a tiny amount of physical movement so I am going to do a little bit each day until Thursday and it should be sorted by then. Touchwood!

My mind has been really active this week, I can’t seem to be able to focus on one thing and my attention keeps jumping to various things at once. This morning I have my facebook, twitter and blog page open also several blogs I am reading, my asda home delivery page and Youtube. I keep jumping from one thing to another, not being able to concentrate on any of it but still trying too. I have tried shutting all pages but one off but after awhile I find myself opening up different ones.. Then I am trying to do several things at once, prep food, wash up, tidy which I know is going to end in disaster because multi tasking is no longer possible. I don’t know why I am doing it, I just feel really restless and want to do as much as possible yet I can’t and I end up getting annoyed and frustrated at myself. I have hardly slept for three nights because of pain and in the early hours of yesterday morning my leg decided to lock and cramp when I moved in my sleep, for 3 hours. This is not a pleasent experience at all, you know how your leg can cramp and your toes go into a weird moving muscle sensation, that’s exactly what it was. Along with the muscle deciding not to go back after gentle rubbing, but stayed around for a few hours like an unwanted disliked guest at a party you didn’t want to go to. The muscle locking is now a daily occurance, one part of me decides to lock then another joins in as though it’s missing out on something, when all it is missing out on is being cursed at by me! I think the lack of sleep is a big factor in my current restlessness, I am hoping to sleep tonight because spending another day like it and dragging myself around is getting very tedious.

I have seen more and more chronic condition sufferers doing video blogs along with their written ones and this interests me. The aim is to visually show exactly what these conditions do to you, how a person looks, speaks, and generally acts. I think this is a really good idea, for many seeing is believing and if it helps to get these conditions more recognition then I am willing to do it. I’m not sure how many people would want to see sweaty, shaky, no make up slurry me I myself am not to keen on my look either! But I am considering doing it for the cause ( sounding like a sufferagette) maybe for my 50th or 100th blog. That’ll then give my blog readers enough time to prepare themselves for that horror ahead.. 😉