Neurologist result

So, I had my letter from the lovely neurologist I saw last month ( the word lovely drips with sarcasm).

Apparently I do only have half vision in my left eye, black spot covering the upper part of my eye being the actual result.

So at least that shows I do have neurological issues.. As brainy as I am even I couldn’t of psychosomaticed that! 😉

It’s a relief to have the proof though, and he has asked my dr to do more sight and prob tests to see why I’m now half blind in that eye.

It’s ridiculous that us chronic illness sufferers have to have the stress of proving we are ill and not imagining things or are hypochondriacs on top of everything else.

It’s exhausting to keep battling ‘specialists’ to recieve any kind of proper care or belief in our illnesses.

It’s as though some people think we enjoy being ill, because yes I imagined my life and future to be 90% bedbound, in constant chronic pain, spasms, seizures and massive migraines brought on by loss of sight . To not be able to function, spend time with my son, family and the guilt that comes along with the inability to be there as you want to be.
Seriously, when I looked to the future I thought yup, that’s the one for me..
Ummm…
No.

The progress I am making at the moment is brilliant and I am hopeful, but at the same time fearful of that hope incase I once again relapse and am back to square one. That the hope once again is taken from me, leaving me in a state of such anger, frustration and betrayl of my own body.

But I will try to quash this down, remain positive and working hard and hit away the fears with my walking stick 😉